Good To You (8)

Seems like its the same shit, just a different year every year. Nothing ever seems to measure up, I'm not prepared for life. Getting that loneliness feeling again, welcome back. I've missed you. You should never change yourself for someone & you should never expect someone to change for you. Maybe this person isn't what you've dreamed about or hoped for, their not the perfect 'guy' or 'girl' that doesn't live up to your expectations. The whole point is to see if you can accept them for all the complications and imperfections the purpose is to be happy with all of these flaws. It maybe be difficult now and maybe it won't even work out at all, maybe it was all a waste of time and effort and who gives a fuck about being optimistic, be real do what makes you happy be with who lifts you up and obviously, if all is said and done and you still can't see yourself being with this person, then it's clear that maybe you shouldn't keep things dragging on. & if you can, congrats, appreciate what you have and cherish the moments that shine. Don't ever regret the things that have once made you smile.

And now I do, want you to know I hold you up above everyone
And I do, want you you to know
I think you'd be good to me and I'd be so good to you..

So please don't waste my time.

Shut it down (8)

I'm tired of everyone & everything. I understand why now, everyones trying to do them. & i'm not mad at anyone or anything because they have there reasons, if anything i envy the fact that they realize it before me. Realized that you can't depend or rely on anyone in this life. It's a dog eat dog world, anyone will drop you if necessay, yeah it sucks and it hurts but thats what people do. They think about themselves first, and its absoloutley the smartest thing anyone can admit. So from here on, I don't care about anyonelses drama cause buddy I got my own. I dont care about anyonelses happiness, cause I finally need to work on myself. I don't care if here and there people make mistakes and fuck you over because nobody's perfect. & all i know is, I'm imperfect and I'm gonna love myself before I love anyonelse. I love my friends, or whats left of them I appreciate everything but I guess it's time to go our seperate ways. Memories fade but the feeling lasts a lifetime.

Should I..?

I've made up my mind,
No need to think it over,
If i'm wrong I aint right,
No need to look no further,
This ain't lust, i know
This is love but,

If i tell the world,
I'll never say enough,
Cause it was not said to you,
And thats exactly what i need to do,
If i'm in love with you,

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?
Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

I'd build myself up,
And fly around in circles,
Wait then as my heart drops,
and my back begins to tingle
finally could this be it

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?
Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?
Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

Betrayl.

Don't know what's right or wrong? what you did was wrong. & If I decide to forgive you guys or not will be up to me, Friends use to come with a meaning but I was right the whole time at the back of my head, Trust noone but yourself but even then sometimes I fear what I might do. People make mistakes but it doesnt mean that they should be given an automatic chance, I use to believe anyone can deserve another chance DEPENDING if the giver believes they do. However right now, I don't even think I can look at anyone, talk to anyone or trust anyone. It might not have been a big deal to you guys or in anyonelses eyes, but it definatley hurt me badly. Never have I thought I'd go through this, Loyalty is everything and lately I've been thinking I've been giving it out way to easily. to Forgive & Forget is a lot to ask of me, now you have to live up to your consequences, If you think about it, you'll only lose a friend I've lost a bestfriend.

It's about me.

I wanna make myself happy for once, no matter how selfish I have to be.

iyiyi

I don't know what to do, I don't know who to be, I don't know who I am anymore.

When did I get so LOST.

Never have high hopes, or any expectations for anybody. you'll just end up dissapointed and that is worse then not knowing at all.

Last chapter.

Here end the lesson, rip the pages and burn the Book.

it's alright.. It's okay it might get better one day..

I guess I was just another chapter in another book. Feels like the same role, just different lines. & the plot, it all ends the same. I'm the climax and then comes the pain.

When all you want is for the past to stay back & move on.

I honestly can't wait until school ends. Some things and people I'm Really not going to miss. I just wanna move on with my life, journey begins. Training wheels come off, off I go.

What's & If ' s

Don't ever live your life leaving things left unsaid, because trust me, Regret is one thing that never leaves your side. No matter how much time passes by.

DUNNOEEE

yaooo guess who's finally certified to drive now bitches ; ) MUAHAHAHA. I can drive legally now without any yelling and bitching beside me telling me im doing this wrong and that right blahblah : ) now I just gotta save up for a car brooooo ^_^ getting there. Accomplishing my goals slowly. ehehhe things are looking up : 0 for now.. dun dun dun

eyes, heart & mind set . $$

PROM! PROM! PROM! PHONE! PHONE! PHONE! CAR! CAR! CAR! $$$

When..

When everything's Changed and nothing stays the Same, flip the next page and make a bigger and better memorable chapter.

I guess eathquakes can shake us.

Just remember your actions caused what comes next. & I'm done being patient and understanding.

i heart House music

Can't wait for school to be done withhhhhh ! , anticipating thursday niggas :D I'm slowly accomplishing the things I want. & thats all that matters, I gotta remember that it's me myself & I in the end. Gotta do me, don't needa worry bout the little things like other people anymore. It's called responsibility and growing up. On another note I'm kinda getting excited for Prom : ) next week friday dawgs. 9 days brooo. shiiiit I gotta get my outfit THIS weekend!, lots of work to doooo shake that money makerrrrr. Anyways, the blistering heat is killing me, I'm literally dying inside and out T_T I hate the sun, i hate the heat I just wanna curl into a ball under a giant tree with shade T_T *sigh, Anyways theres a lot of things I not only WANT but WILL do I dont give a fuckkkkkkkk no time to loaft and be lazy bitches! this is our YEAR, hit the beaches in the day, hit the clubs at night ; ) ya'll know how we doo. Anyways im outskii niggass hopefully the next entry will be more about me moving forward in life.

fucking thieves.

I swear I feel like my family is really cursed with badluck. Everyone has financial problems yeah but im not everybodyelse, and it's pretty dam important and gets to me when were having money issues or what not. I always tell myself to save up and help out and prepare myself for the future and what not. Yet I can't even decide on a career, I cant even save for the life of me. I tell myself to be a better person, but for some reason I always stray from being that person. As many times as I say I dislike this and that and them, This guilty feeling in my gut just wants to DO somthing. & honestly, it may take a long time and a lot of work but I need motivation and inspiration in my life to keep my word, because I'm not a kid anymore, growing up time starts Now.

List

- Just fucking Graduate. Get it over with

- Stabely start and commit to a 'healthy lifestyle change' in otherwords, stop being a fatass.

- Handle two jobs and save up 3/4.

- Help pay off house bills, my own bills constantly.

- Save up for future college tuition.

- Buy a car.

It's like a fucking rollercoaster.

Same shit different day, if your gonna read this, don't expect me to explain it to you afterward, because its pretty much self-explanatory and I have no answers for you. The same fights it's recurrent almost everyday now. I'm not saying I'm fed up with you or this relationship. It's just unnecessary, wasteful and tiring . Always having to argue my way through, I' m not saying I'm the perfect idealist boyfriend or whatever, I yell I cuss and I'll act like a jerk when I'm mad . but at least I give 2 damns. Why the fuck do we have such a hard time handling situations and cant agree, act stubborn and always try to take the easy way escape. We have our ups and downs, were not perfect but we do need A LOT of work. I gotta see a lot more from you in order to see a bit more of me. I'm trying here, but when can I give up trying and actually make it work?

You let Me know.

Everybody falls in love sometimes (8)

" Wanna know how to hurt someone? Don't think about them. "

Eenie Meenie

" You can't help who you fall in love with. "